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Observationcity.com

Observations I made on my commute to and from work. (Not to be read while working).

The entire archive AND current editions of observations that have made several people laugh over the last few years.

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Click here for my ever popular Holiday Observations.

Remember, when you say that someone has “Lost all their marbles”, you’re assuming they had some to begin with.

How funny is it that the lead singer for Warrant had a “warrant” out for his arrest ?

Hey Netflix, I already am a customer. Quit with your stupid pop up ads when I try to read a news story or I will suddenly be a former customer.

Whenever I get called a “son of a bitch” it doesn’t faze me at all. But boy does my mom sure get ticked off.

I’ve never experienced love at first sight. But I’m sure am no stranger to “love at first ignore.”

Iran/Iraq? Which one is the copy-catter? Because their names are just way too alike.

One of my friends from the Hip Hop community used to call people “Punk ass bitch,” a lot. Is no one ever just a “punk-bitch”?

If I have learned one thing in this world it’s that when you close your eyes, there’s a fine line between fine brie and stinky feet.

In a modern world, how am I supposed to tell the difference between a cotton-eyed Joe and a polyester-eyed Joe?

As I grew older I realized that the “things that go bump in the night” were really just my parents tripping over all my stuff I left on the floor and never put away.

Pop star Pink looks a lot like Susan Powder.

I notice that a lot of food companies will put on their packaging “Enjoy by” dates rather than expiration dates. And that’s fine. But what would be better is an “Enjoy by Date” followed by a “You won’t enjoy it but at least it won’t make you sick” date. THEN have an expiration date.

You know what would make gymnastics better to watch? If one of them came up with a Winter-sault.

Half marathons should just be called "Maras" or "Thons."

The only thing different between “make believe” and “pretend” is the age of people doing it.

If there’s one thing I’ve noticed it’s that no one in a tense situation is ever on “push pins and thumb tacks.”

I saw that CNBC had live coverage of Black Friday. That way, in case you don't want to be a complete idiot and go shopping on that day, you can be a complete loser and watch it.

That movie Cars really makes you realize that in their society, it’s very Caste-like. I mean, if you’re brought into this world as a model T or a tow truck, you’re never going to be anything else. Weird how Hollywood allowed such a thing to be conveyed.

I’m not going to have a section on a wall or door frame that will measure how tall my daughter gets over the years. Rather, I’m just never going to wash her finger prints off the wall mirror and write a date next to them every once in a while. I mean, they’re bound to get higher with age.

Here’s the link to the ever popular Holiday Observations. Enjoy
http://observationcity.com/holiday.htm

Follow me on Twitter and get a couple holiday observations a day while out shopping.
http://twitter.com/johngutierrez

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